Can You Do Drugs At Oktoberfest? 

No. No you can’t, legally. Unless you count beer as a drug, in which case yes. Yes you most certainly can do the drug called beer and it’s friend Jagermeister at Oktoberfest. The problem with doing drugs at Oktoberfest is that you’re really really not allowed to. It’s super illegal to do drugs that aren’t beer in Germany, and they’re especially vigilant on patrolling the festival itself and all of the entry points for people with drugs; there are random sniffer dog stops, they can do a piss test on you whenever they want to, and if you’re caught with drugs in your system the German polizei will give you a hard time, a big-ass fine, and you’ll stay on their druggo database so they can harass you for the foreseeable future. 

None of this is very desirable. 

That said, sometimes people want to do drugs at Oktoberfest. We say, No you shouldn’t, and they say, Well eff you, I’m going to do it anyway. And you know why that is? Because Oktoberfest is on planet earth, and it’s a really good time, and when people are having a really good time on planet earth sometimes they’re going to do drugs. What we’re saying is, it’s kind of inevitable. 

So, look. We’re going to write a guide about not doing drugs at Oktoberfest, because you most certainly should not do drugs at Oktoberfest, and if you decide to ignore our advice and do them anyway, well that my fine little friendling is entirely up to you. 

Alrighty, let’s dance. 

Can you smoke cigarettes at Oktoberfest?

Yes, but you shouldn’t. Remember a time when ciggies were the wafting beacon of a sexy maverick, someone who plays by their own rules and has the conquests to prove it? No more! Now durrie munching makes you smell like the carpet in your bachelor great uncle’s sitting room cum bedroom cum kitchen (use of cum intentional). Smoking kills, smoking stinks and smoking is expensive. BUT when we’re hammered we smoke, and at Oktoberfest we’re almost always hammered, so yeah you can smoke outside the beer halls, and you will. 

BEWARE: smoking when you’re on the other side of the shitfaced threshold will give you seasickness and that could be morbid in a crowded, hectic, already heaving place like Oktoberfest. 

COST: pack of darts, €6.

Can you drink alcohol at Oktoberfest?

Der. While most of life’s celebrations include alcohol, this is one that is explicitly and shamelessly based around it. They serve seven million litres of beer at Oktoberfest (for seven million mouths, which is nothing compared to the 60,000 litres we serve to our 8,000 or so guests at our Stoketoberfest open bar), plus wine to the weirdos who can’t just stop being so sophisticate’ while they’re at the world’s biggest beer festival. People generally drink about three-four litres of beer in the beer halls, which makes the sevel-mil for seven-mil stat so weird, but anyway. People drink their beer, they drink other people’s beer, we’ve even seen them drink beer-laced vomit and steins of piss, so yeah you can imagine how much beer is being consumed here. It’s so wild that in a nation so anti-drug that this wanton piss up not only happens, but is replicated on an almost daily basis in beer gardens and restaurants and homes and petrol stations around the country. You can also drink Jagermeister and other shots, and some of the little bars outside the beer halls even serve harder shit, because yeah sure you totally need that. 

BEWARE: if you’re in the beer halls for the morning session the security guards will use your inebriation as an excuse to eject you. This is less because they have a problem with intoxicated people – it’s literally the spine of their event – and more because they’ve done the math and you’re not able to physically drink any more and they want to free up some space for the thirsty afternoon arrivals. 

COST: about 12 bucks

Can you smoke weed at Oktoberfest?

Why would you want to? Why would you want to lower your energy, increase your paranoia, and increase your appetite in what might be the most expensive food court in Europe? Plus, every time we’ve ever smoked weed after drinking we’ve ended up feeling like we’re floating in a dingy during a North Sea storm; it’s a surefire way to green out. BUT we get it that some of you modern-day Bob Marlettes like a bit of wacky tabbacky to go with your festivities, and so you might want to blaze up in the beer halls. But you can’t! It is still illegal in Germany to smoke the devils’ lettuce and you will get harassed by the cops. That said, having a small amount on you isn’t enough to be prosecuted, so if you can’t last a few days without your sticky icky icky make sure you don’t carry around a trafficable quantity, let’s say less than six grams.

BEWARE: just because you won’t be prosecuted for having a small amount doesn’t mean the sniffer dogs won’t go for you, to po-po won’t stop you, piss test you, detain you a while, confiscate your weed, maybe fine you, etc. If you need to smoke, just wait until you’re back at the campsite. 

COST: honestly not a lot, until those munchies kick in.  

Can you take pills at Oktoberfest?

If they’re prescription, yes you can. But there aren’t many prescription pills that you can confidently take while drinking copious amounts of alcohol. We’re not doctors, but we heard from one, or someone who had spoken to someone who had spoken to a doctor, that the reason why you shouldn’t drink when you take antibiotics isn’t because it’s dangerous, but because the booze lowers the efficacy of the drugs and ruins the full course. But yeah, if it’s safe to take your pills when drinking then you can totally take them, unless you’re talking about those other types of pills, which you most definitely cannot take at Oktoberfest, but geez louise they’d be fun! 

BEWARE: while there’s quite the pill culture in Berlin’s techno clubs, and you’re less likely to be stopped and searched, or punished coming out of the Berghain, Munich in general, and Oktoberfest in particular, is a different story. This is billed as a family event, despite the copious amounts of booze consumed, and so drug laws are applied to the letter. Taking half a pill and dancing on tables sounds like a swell idea, but it comes with great risks and maybe even greater consequences. 

COST: really no idea, we don’t think pills cost much in general. Maybe more because it’s Oktoberfest.

Can you do coke at Oktoberfest? 

Despite the videos you’ve seen of people doing cocaine at Oktoberfest, you can’t do cocaine at Oktoberfest. The white powder people are snorting off the backs of their hands, or off the beer tables, is Wiesen Kok, which translates to Wiesen (the Oktoberfest fairgrounds) coke. It’s little more than sugar with a little menthol flavour, or something, and really does nothing more than clear your nose maybe. So yeah, while you may see a bunch of videos of what seems like revellers racking up with impunity, they’re just playing coke head, not actually being one. Now, cocaine, the real stuff, is illegal and even if you did it a few days before, if it shows in your peepee test you’re in big trouble. So while it might be just what you need to sober up a bit and talk someone’s ear off, it can land you in big trouble.
BEWARE: we can’t help but think, though, that the proliferation of fake coke presents an opportunity to put the real deal in Weisen Kok bottles and do beer-hall bumps with impunity… but as everyone generally shares the fake stuff, just be prepared for a local granny to ask you for a line.
COST: more than Spain, less than Australia. 

Can you do LSD or take shrooms at Oktoberfest?

Really couldn’t think of anywhere worse to be tripping. Seriously. It’s such an intense environment, with all the people vibrating at super drunk frequencies and bumping into you and getting in your face, and then there’s the law that puts LSD on the same level as heroin in Germany, meaning that if you’re tripping out hard and losing your shit you would probably be too scared to tell the authorities what’s up and that would make it infinitely worse. If you are a confident mind-bender then you can do what a friend of ours allegedly did: put a droplet of LSD in the bottom corner of certain pages of the book he was reading. Then when he wanted to get high he’d just cut out the corner of page 36 and away he’d fly. 

BEWARE: hallucinogens need to be treated differently to party drugs. They can really mess with your upstairs mix-up. 

COST: potentially your sanity.  

Can you do meth or speed at Oktoberfest? 

We’ve seen some people who would probably benefit from this, but again no you cannot, because you just can’t. While it is the drug of choice for many of Germany’s clubbers, there’s no point taking amphetamines at Oktoberfest because it’s not an all-night deal. If you’re not on your way home by midnight you’re going to be in those big old fairgrounds all alone. Doing speed or meth at Oktoberfest would just crank your pestiness up to unneeded levels, both in the beer halls and then back at the campsite when everyone is trying to sleep. Anyways, meth should really be on your list of never-do drugs, no good has ever come from being a meth head except for those wonderful Facebook rants that the methin’ around crew go on sometimes. Man, they’re so horny. 

Can you do heroin at Oktoberfest?

What? Why would you want to? What is this? No you can’t do heroin at Oktoberfest. Jesus some people. 

And there you have it, all the drugs you can’t do at Oktoberfest. Normally we’d say enjoy, but you shouldn’t enjoy any of these except for beer, and even then in moderation. Really excessive moderation. Also, stay at our Oktoberfest campsite for an all-inclusive experience, the best parties outside the beer halls, and an open bar.

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How To Do Oktoberfest On A Budget

We know what you’re thinking, you’re thinking that we’re just going to say, Camping with Stoke Travel at Oktoberfest is the best budget option, and you’re right, we could say that, because it IS  the best option, as written about by multiple independent bloggers like this gal, and this guy and, and over here too, and not to forget about these guys.

But we’re going to assume that you already know that Stoketoberfest is your best value accommodation option at Munich’s Oktoberfest. We’re going to  move along from that, and show you ways to save your hard-earned euros/pounds/dollars/pesos/baht/rupiah/whatever when you’re on the ground in Munich. These tips are good to go even if you’re not staying with Stoke, in fact, if you’re not staying with Stoke you might need them more because you’re obviously paying WAY TOO MUCH.
Anyway, here we go. P-to the-motherflipping-prost!

Dressing for Oktoberfest on a budget

Whet your whistle over here for our full guide to dressing for Oktoberfest.

OK, look while you can wear your civilian rags into the beer halls, that in no way means that you should. One of the great delights of Oktoberfest is to hit those beer halls dressed like a Bavarian beer-swilling legend! Almost everyone else is dressed in the trachten and you’ll feel like a prize pumpkin if you’re the only one wearing dickies and Limp Bizkit tee. 

So while Stoke Travel sells authentic and cheap Oktoberfest costumes for guys and girls, we’re obviously not here to tell you about how awesome we are! We’re here to tell you that you can look the part just by throwing on one of the chequered-table-cloth style Oktoberfest shirts, for both girls and guys and forgoe the expensive leather pants and braces for guys, or the entire milkmaids’ dress for the gals. 

Yeah, going all out and wearing the whole kit is a bunch of fun, but if you’re stretched for cash just throw an Oktoberfest shirt (you could go with anything chequered/plaid/flannel, but they’re cheap cheap so fork out on this) over some jeans, jean shorts, Daisy Dukes, chinos, cargos, a skirt – whatever! And you’ll fully look the part. 

If you’re not feeling too tight, accessorise up with hats and pins and whatever and nobody will even notice that you’re not fully playing the part, and before you know it you’ll be dancing on tabletops with a bunch of Bavarian beefcakes and betties. What a result!

Oktoberfest beer halls on a budget

Dip your proboscis in here for a full guide to drinking beer in Oktoberfest beer halls.

One thing that’s unavoidable, no matter how tight your wad is, is that you will spend a small fortune in the beer halls. You just will, it’s one of life’s truths like dodging death and taxes. But DW, going to Oktoberfest to spend money on beer is precisely what you signed up for. If you haven’t put a king’s ransom into your budget for Oktoberfest beers then why are you even here. But, that said, there are some ways we can save money in the beer halls, and they are so important that we’re going to listicle them.

  1. Pre-drink
    If you’re staying with Stoke you would have smashed the open bar all morning, so you’re good to go. Don’t be afraid of grabbing some roadies, just hide them when the po-po is around, and even stop off at the convenience store, or even the bar/beer garden on the way in. You’ll be forced to dump your vessel at the Oktoberfest entry, but never fear because there are plenty of non-beer-hall bars inside the fairgrounds and they are well cheaper than the beer halls. Pre-party like a champ, but don’t fuck it up because the main event is inside. 
  2. Respect the beer, respect the system
    Surviving Oktoberfest is an artform. Make sure you don’t pregame too much, because the beers are strong like bull and delicious like bull. That’s good because after like your third or fourth beer in there you’re already in the spirit realm so you can’t spend too much… lies! Of course you can, because like any journey into the spirit realm any fiscal prudence is out the door and replaced with a frivolous need for ridiculous items like rollercoaster rides, cool hats and daring people €20 to drink their own vomit (they do it surprisingly often). ONE THING that we have to say is don’t scrimp on the tip. You have to tip the beer maid every beer, just to be a good supportive human, and to make sure that your wonderful beerfrau comes back to you when you need her most*
    *Sorry about the antiquated gendered language, there are beer bros in there, but the ladies are just the best at serving beers. 
  3. Slip a Jaeger in your pocket
    You can buy little shots in there to give your sesh a much-needed shot in the arm, but they’re going to cost you as well, when you can just pick up some little bot-bots of petrol station Jaeger and store them away in your pockets, so then when you’re feeling a little too sober (never) you can boost your situation with a quick throwback of the magic elixir. Jaeger is German, Oktoberfest is German, you’re feeling über German, you kind of have to do it. 
  4. Don’t do drugs!
    We know that in many parts of the world a sneaky pill or bump might be a way to drink less and enjoy more, but in Germany the penalties for drug use are big time, there are sniffer dogs all over, piss tests at the ready, and if you come up positive you’ll be in the system for life (meaning that every time they stop you, they’ll test you – how annoying!). That said, it is kind of the perfect place to be hiiiiiiiiiigh, so if you’re a brave party monster then maybe go for it, but it’s all up to you. We said NO.

Oktoberfest food on a budget

Here are five things that you just have to eat at Oktoberfest

One of the finer things in Oktoberfest life is the ability to devour, without concern for calorie or keto, the perfectly-paired beer drinking foods that come served alongside the beer. For the locals, and the visitors in-the-know, Oktoberfest is as much a food festival as it is an excuse to pickle your insides in amber ale. Pork knuckles, roast chicken, all the wurst, pretzels – even trout and radishes – are just some of the culinary delights that await is inside those hallowed halls. But boy-oh-boy are they expensive, and if you’re doing Oktoberfest right you might not even enjoy them, as you shovel the food into your sloppily masticating jowls like a St Bernard eating a valium hamburger. 

The real pros put a meal aside, usually a pre-hall lunch, and visit one of Munich’s many permanent beer halls or beer gardens. In these year-round pleasure domes you’ll find the same beers and the same food at a much lower price, and yeah, sure, you’ll take a hit on Oktoberfest’s ambience for a more sit down vibe, but these Bavarian temples to indulgence are not by any means tame – think oompah bands, large groups of raucous locals belting out folk tunes at the top of their lungs, it’s more like being in a medieval wedding than a French bistro. And they’re everywhere, so you can get your Bavarian food fix on your way to the beer halls and then push yourself to the brink of throwing it all up again in the actual Oktoberfest. Win win! 

Just look at how many breweries, beer gardens and beer halls a quick Google search turns up in central Munich alone! 

Seeing Munich on a budget

Strap on your sightseeing boots before you head out to see these Munich hotspots

OK, this is the ultimate activity to tightwads for there aren’t many sights to see that are going to charge you – in fact the whole act of “seeing” implies doing it for free. How they gonna charge you for seeing? “Just looking” is the universal secret password for “I don’t intend on spending a gosh-darn cent”. The beauty of Munich is that once you get downtown, and we didn’t say this, but we’ve heard that many people ride Munich’s rail system without a ticket, you can walk around all day, see the most beautiful and wonderful buildings and people, lounge around in a park where people are surfing in a river surrounded by naked old people, drink store-bought beer in said park, stroll around some more, fall in love 800 times, and it ain’t going to cost you a deutschmark. 

Get off at Hauptbahnhof and just walk – you can’t go wrong and you won’t spend a cent.   

Getting to and away from Oktoberfest on a budget

Here’s our complete guide on how to travel to Oktoberfest. You don’t need much more than that, just know that as far as a rule of thumb is concerned slower equals cheaper. Here’s a list in ascending order of expense: walking; hitchhiking; rideshare; public bus; private Stoke bus; hire a car; train; airplane; helicopter. Do with that what you will. 

And there you have it! Follow this little guide and get yo’self the most bang for your meagre buck at Munich’s Oktoberfest. And yeah, the easiest way to save the most money is to do an all-inclusive stay with us at our Stoketoberfest party camp, where you’ll find an open and unlimited beer and sangria bar for only an extra €10 a day!

 

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