The Six Stages Of A Festival Romance

A walk through of the quickly escalating festival romance.  

JOSEPHINE RYAN MURPHY

A festival romance is a wonderful, unique and kind of gross thing. There really isn’t anything quite like it. The rules are different, everything moves at a different rate and once the festival is over, it remains there as a fond and amusing memory but nothing more.  

The Initial Meeting

Day one, you’ve rocked up to the campsite all bright eyed and bushy tailed. The full impact of being at a festival is yet to ruin you. You have your first few drinks sitting in the sun outside your tent meeting your festival neighbours when you catch eyes. You introduce yourself and chat, all the while weighing each other up as a potential good time.

Substances Kick In

As the night progresses and your mind vibrates through a blur of lights and music, all seen through those suspiciously brighter eyes, you spot each other. The flirting is all of a sudden a lot more intense. You’re not actually sure if anything either of you are saying makes any sense or even if you’re talking about the same thing, but while the verbal communication may not be quite there, the physical is and beside, the music’s too loud to hear each other anyway. And the sensation of touching right now is definitely more fun than hearing.

Chilling At Tents

You find some bullshit excuse, which you both know is definitely bullshit to head back to the tents. Tripping over tent wires and stumbling like Godzilla onto and into everyone else’s tents, you eventually make it back. You then have to deal with the initial awkwardness of the tent itself. Do you just climb in, or? It’s not like being invited back to someone’s place where you can actually sit on a sofa or something and have a drink rather than literally crawling hands and knees straight into their bed.

The Awkward Tent Sex

Tents generally are not that big and the walls are just pieces of material that are not at all soundproof and also they make shit tonnes of noise whenever you move in any way at all. Due to the lack of space around you, you both have to remain pretty much stationary bar the obvious bits, not to mention neither of you can remember the last time you showered. You basically just lie flopped, one of you on top of the other jolting back and forth rubbing your dirty sweaty parts on each other.

The Exit

Even if you don’t actually want to leave, you’ll need to pee or something and it’s not like just leaving the room to use the toilet and then getting back into bed. The equivalent of climbing out of that tent is leaving someone’s house and walking onto a street full of people you know — and if you leave the house is it cool to climb back in? So after an eternity of lying, eyes wide open staring at the spinning roof of the suffocatingly hot tent contemplating, you’ll eventually pull yourself through the tent door, the air hitting your face making it feel like a rebirth of some kind. And since you feel awkward about climbing back in, if they’re asleep when you crawl out, they’re gonna just assume you ditched. And then of course, you realise you’ve left all your shit in there.

The ending

You’re living in very close quarters, it’s almost like living together for those few days. You’ve got two options really, commit and tent-move-in together or avoid each other entirely. And so what started as a potentially nice thing has now eroded into awkward waves and nods of the head. It was fun while it lasted though.

To fill your summer with moments like these, come join Stoke on one of our festivals this season!

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SECOND. Carlota Jauregui, longboard de aquí

Hoy me he encontrado este vídeo guapo de Carlota Jauregui, por fin algo interesante hecho y “Surfeado” en nuestro país. Un bello edit firmado por URKO, en algún lugar del País Vasco donde Carlota nos demuestra su buen hacer sobre las olas. Aprovecho para recordaros que hoy a las 20:30 sacamos el NUEVO NÚMERO DE […]
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Tenemos nueva revista Hangten, New issu. Hangten Nº #6

Estamos muy contentos de presentaros un nuevo número de HANGTEN MAGAZINE, el número 6. Venimos con 158 páginas del mejor longboard y surfing clásico, esperamos que os guste y lo disfrutéis y entre todos sigamos poniendo en el mapa esta modalidad de surf que nos tiene atrapados. Os animamos a leer esta publicación con detenimiento, despacito y […]
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Hangten Magazine N6. NEW ISSU

Estamos muy contentos de presentaros la nueva revista, este número 6 de HANGTEN MAGAZINE, viene cargado, nada menos que 158 páginas de puro surfing clásico. 1º Marcos Paladino portafolio 2º Wayne Lynch (Doggy style surfboards) 3º Mi lugar en el fin del mundo. Jesús Busto 4º Ilustralong. MAUS JAUS 5º Sri Lanka. Ivan Trovalusci 6º Mi […]
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Stoke Travel’s Ibiza Gig Guide July 21-26

Oh Ibiza, aren’t you just an unstoppable, Hawaiian-shirt-wearing bull on a skateboard, weaving through the west-end, leaving a pile of battered and bruised hens parties in your wake. Just like those who go to Pamplona each year to conquer their fears of things they should be legitimately afraid of, hordes of people come from all over the world to put their bodies to the ultimate test of indulgence and expose themselves to all sorts of things not accepted by regular society.
 
Fear not, let’s do a quick round-up of the best parties from 21 – 27 July, so you spend as little time possible mixed up in the wrong group of girls on a hen’s night.
 
Friday 21 July
The weekend is starting, not that that means anything in Ibiza, because every day is the same. Wake up, breakfast, beach, lunch, beach, drink, dance, get a taxi home. Now I think of it, ‘Eat Sleep Rave Repeat’ does have a better ring to it, but I digress. Friday is the night to party. Tonight is the night.
Disclosure are hosting the first party of their four-week residency at DC-10. The normally very underground club will be getting down to the sounds of of this British house brotherly duo alongside Annie Mac, Tiga & Audion and Denis Sulta. Tickets will be hard to come by, so jump now to avoid missing out.
Saturday 22 July
So you’ve been listening to ‘Latch’ on repeat for the last 2 weeks in preparation for the best night of your life, which was last night. Well, it’s time to switch things up and go to The Zoo Project, where you will not find a list of DJs or even set times. Set in Benimussa Park, Ibiza’s old zoo, this is a party like nothing else. Picture guests dressed to the nines in animal costumes, dancers, art installations, performers and cracking techno and house all in the open air. Did you ever want to rage at your local zoo’s seal enclosure? Tonight’s the night.
Sunday 23 July
Oh my gosh. Today is the day you can all let out your inner fan girl/boy, throw caution to the wind and just let you do you, because today is the day that Paris Hilton plays at Amnesia for her Foam and Diamonds party. What a time to be alive. Alternatively, you can go see your tropical house man of the moment Kygo at Ushuaia or there’s even a free(!) party at the sparklingly white pool party venue Destino featuring Guy Gerber. Tonight is also starting to seem like it is in fact the night.
Monday 24 July
There are not many 2-word combinations that can split a room like these two words I am about to lay down on you. David Guetta. Half of you have just internally squealed with joy, and the other half have just vomited a little bit in your mouth. As polarising as this French man may be, he puts on a rather large hoe-down called BIG! at Ushuaia every Monday. For those of you who like your dance music a little more cerebral, Sven Vath will be joined by Solomun,Adam Beyer and many more at his Cocoon night at Amnesia. Tonight’s the bloody night.
Tuesday 25 July
Are you of British descent? Because if so, you’ll feel right at home tonight at Amnesia. Chase and Status, Sub Focus, Duke Dumont, Hannah Wants and many more will be throwing down all the drum ‘n’ bass and house you can shake a stick of gum at. Throw your arm around the stranger next to you and despair at how expensive London is.
I realise we’re most of the way through July, but someone didn’t tell the folk down at Resistance because they’re holding their opening party tonight. Techno heavyweights from across the globe will play at this party every week at Privilege. The opening night will of course be no exception, with B2B (ask your techno friends) sets from more names than I wish to list. Sunrise on the terrace here really is something to behold. If tonight’s not the night, then I don’t know what is.
Wednesday 26 July
Do you like Dutch DJs? Because if you do, you’re probably going to wet your pants at the prospect of seeing Armin van Buuren at the newly opened Hi Ibiza. What used to be known as Space is now a wonderland of electronic music enjoyment. Get there. If you don’t like Dutch DJs (racist) then I don’t think there are too many playing at Jamie Jones‘ weekly night known as Paradise at DC-10. Great music, great club, possibly great people. Tonight is definitely the night, I’m calling it.
All of these parties are within easy reach of our Ibiza Beach Camp, where you can recharge your batteries, eat good food and make some of the best friends you’ll ever meet. 

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The Chosen One: Stoke’s San Vino

Editor’s note: over the winter we ran a competition to find the “Chosen One”, a one-of-a-kind, absolutely average, everyday hero who would win our Most Ordinary Extraordinary Job In The World — a summer of back-to-back Stoke Travel trips, where not only would they be expected to have the time of their life, but to also much in and set up tents/serve you heathens your beer. Well, our old mate Ryan is the winner, the Chosen One, and this is his blog about his time with Stoke Travel. One trip down, who knows how many to go, get ready for the most fun of your life, Ryno. 

RYAN WHITAKER

 

Five hours on a bus with the Stoke Travel Co., and I already knew that the competition I won would provide me the experience of a lifetime. The general mood of the crowd started off with intimate groups of people; some friends, some strangers; talking amongst themselves until Seija, the event manager, came up with a game for us all to play. The three people who had had sex in the most obscure places, would receive free bottles of wine. Mind you, this was immediately after a rest stop to which the majority of the persons on the trip procured alcohol; therefore, the group started to lighten up to each other. With the combination of putting all our dirty laundry on the table and the alcohol, we were well adjusted to each other once we arrived on camp.

The bus ride, Barcelona to San Vino, where the official “no drinking” rule was absolutely not enforced.

The San Vino campsite ground zero the night before the madness really begins.


I soon met various members of the team, some of whom I would party with the rest of the summer, as well as the upwards to two-hundred guests, open-minded festival-goers ready to experience some of what Stoke’s culture is all about. The first night of unlimited beer and sangria was not interrupted by the rain, as we crowded under the awning, dancing until the early hours of the morning. The next day was spent lounging, enjoying each other’s company, the wheel of misfortune, the unlimited beer and sangria, and, emblematic of a festival about wine happening in Spain’s wine country, a wine and cheese pairing. At night we navigated the streets of Haro until we found ourselves in front of a giant DJ set up in the town’s square. We danced with the locals, watched the fireworks, and, of course, drank the vino.

There are no organic bulls at San Vino, but that doesn’t stop this guy from donning a metal bull and filling it with fireworks.

Haro town square, party central where tourists and locals mix freely (and sometimes amorously).


We woke up early and dressed in our freshest whites before our ascent to the top of the Riscos de Bilibio, armed with water guns filled with wine from a carton and transported by buses with seats draped over with plastic. The only word I can think to describe the following event is: carnage. We feebly returned fire with our water guns as we were drenched in wine thrown from buckets and hydroponic backpacks, pushing forward, out of the shade from trees and farther up the mountain. We basked in the sun once at the top, cheering over a view that overlooked the vineyards and the countryside. I simply remember thinking to myself that, “God is an artist,” as a smile formed at my face and I thought forward to the summer ahead.

The walk to the Wine Fight, looking clean.

The return from the Wine Fight, looking less than clean.

Sound like your kind of fun? Damn straight it does. Whether it’s for next year’s San Vino, another type of food fight, or a chance to be the Chosen One, come and dance with Stoke Travel sooner rather than later.

 

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Sri Lanka, una pista de la portada de nuestro próximo número…

Sri Lanka, esa isla del océano Índico, esconde spots aptos para disfrutar con el tablón. Un entorno mágico a la par que salvaje, lo que lo convierte en un surftrip de aventura. Allí se fueron Lola Mignot, Karina Rozunko, Sierra Lerback y Luki O’Keefe, filmadas por Giovanni Barberis & Luca Merli, para deleitarnos con ese clip, que […]
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The 60:40 Golden Ratio

Or how to perfectly pack any social gathering

It may flummox you to know this, but there is a scientifically proven way to ensure that all of your party guests derive the maximum pleasure from the gathering. Its taken years of hard work and observation, partying as much as we possibly can, in order to come to this realisation. What we are about to share with you, is our theory of The Golden Ratio, the perfect ratio of women to men at any alcohol fuelled event, that ensure the most fun and the least idiocy.*

We’re not saying that any of this is true in all cases. For the most part, people are pretty great. However, take a group of strangers on holidays, pump em full of alcohol and watch as they delipidate into lizard-brain horny morons. The personality traits that make them all different dissolve, leaving behind only their primal, animalistic instinct. And not only are they animals, they’re drunk ones so the whole thing gets pretty fucked if the ratio dosen’t work.

N.B. The following examples are as true of your house parties as they are of Stoke events. This is our gift to you, the fruits of many, many years observing and participating in social gatherings. We’re not saying that our findings are conclusive, but they’re pretty much spot on all the same.

100:0 girls:guys – Girls nights are pretty great, no one creeping on you or bugging you with their shit chat, just good fun gals talk and shit tonnes of dancing. The only problem is, all the built up stuff come out and it often turns into a night of just crying and telling eachother how much we actually love each other which is lovely but just, not every night you know.

90:10 girls:guys – In the mind of the girls, the guys may as well just not be there. They probably don’t give shit about the 10% who are sitting in a corner somewhere, confronted by what they thought would be a dream come true but is actually a little frightening. They’ll realise that they’ll either be ignored all night, feeling like they’re intruding on girls night, or they’ll just have to suck it up and be one of the girls for the night.

50:50 girls:guys – Pretty good ratio but you will still find that not everyone talks to the opposite sex purely because they want to fuck and statistically more guys are up for it than girls and so the ratio of is still a little heavy on the male side.

10:90 girls:guys –Take a group of drunk, steroid pumped bros and put them in the same room as far too few girls and you can smell the testosterone in the air and actually see the total panic in their eyes as they realise that their chances are not looking too good and their fragile ego may be about to fall apart. not only are their very few girls present but those that are there will be turned off by all this bizarre desperation and so will probably stick to themselves making it almost as bad as a 0:100 party. All this pent up sexual frustration then generally turns into anger resulting in drunk, messy and embarrassing fights. Real “gorillas in the mist” kind of shit, if the mist is a haze of wasted sangria at Stoke’s most recent Running of the Bulls sausage fest.

0:100 girls:guys – Absolute fucking carnage. Immediately aware that there is no hope, things get weird. The whole party escalates terrifyingly fast as beers are shot gunned and bonged. The whole thing results in shirtless, alcohol covered dudes banging their chests, starting fights and shitting and pissing everywhere. Also, y’ever wonder why the most macho guys in the outside world are so quick to jump the fence in jail? Throw a 0:100 party and find out for yourself.

60:40 girls:guys – perfecto, a little more girls than guys makes everyone chill out a bit. We can all just talk to each other and have fun without any underlying sexual frustration. All the ‘lads on tour’ can look at the crowd and feel like the got a good chance of getting laid and none of the girls get overwhelmed by a fuck load of sexpests.

We’ve always been great at getting the ratio right, but the opening weekend of our Running of the Bulls camp was a little skewiff. We’ll be working hard to make sure the ratio is returned to its golden 60:40 equilibrium asap. And this isn’t to say that without the ratio our gorgeous and treasured Stokie males will devolve into chest-tatt pounding muscle-bound troglodytes, but when the ratio is off, some of them will. It’s not personal, it’s evolution, baby.

 

*This is a very heteronormative concept, so we absolutely would like to hear from our LGBTQIA Stokies on how this concept plays out amongst other sexualities.

 

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SUCK MY WAVE, lo último de CAPTAIN FIN co.

Siempre nos entusiasma ver cuando una marca o cualquier flimer nos trae un cortometraje, por encima de los 3-4 minutosa los que estamos acostumbrados en vídeos de surfing. En este caso es la marca estadounidense Captain Fin quien nos trae un corto de 22 minutos que seguro que gustará a todo el abanico del mundo […]
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The Tattoos You’ll See In Every Hostel

Seven tattoos that you’ll find on at least one person at every hostel you stay, ever.

JOSEPHINE RYAN MURPHY

Mandalas, triangles, that bird and feather thing, they’re everywhere. It’s hard to come across a tattoo that hasn’t come straight from pinterest and the more you travel the more repetitive they become — and better than that is, they probably have no idea what the tattoo even means. Below is a list of some of the most common and most nonsensical that you’ll come across

The Unalome

The spiral thingy you keep seeing. Cultural appropriation is everywhere and almost unavoidable, in fact tattoos themselves were probably once culturally appropriating an ancient tribe somewhere. The actual meaning behind this tattoo comes from a Buddhist symbol which indicates that the person has reached enlightenment or nirvana. A pretty impressive thing to achieve and it’s hard to believe that the girl passed out in a hostel bed next to her own vomit has done it.

The Infinity Symbol

Infinity is an incredibly complex concept. An already formed… thing that, while being already formed, is also somehow endless but not actually going on and on as in getting bigger but going on and on and also somehow never actually changing in size. Mind fuck. People with PHDs in sciency things still discuss it and although the dude dancing in the corner and grinding his teeth to dust may actually be one of these people and have a fairly good grasp on the whole infinity thing, it’s just not that likely.

The Wave Line

There’s got to be another way to remind yourself how much the sea or some other sort of body of water means to you. Yeah it’s a pretty cool tattoo, it’s simple and it looks nice almost anywhere but use your imagination – and adding an EKG line doesn’t count. It’s almost as though there’s some unwritten rule where at some point, anyone with a few tattoos has to get this one in order to be allowed to get any more. Look at the roster in any tattoo parlour and you are guaranteed to see it scheduled multiple times each week. Gone are the days where tattoos made you a little different.

The Arrow

The symbol of an arrow originated from tribal hunter-gatherer communities, representing this tool that ensure their survival. These people literally used arrows to go out into the wild and hunt down food for their families. Walk into a starbucks now and you will more than likely come across quite a few.

The Tribal One

So ok, maybe you can justify things like mandalas, you may not be Buddhist or Hindu but you do really fucking love yoga and so you’ve experienced the spiritual meanings behind it. Tribal tattoos however, unless you are actually in a tribe or have some meaningful connection to one, makes no fucking sense. Why do people have them? Is it a weird masculine empowerment thing? I don’t get it. At all. Please someone explain it to me.

The Southern Cross

There’s a whole big thing about this, whether its nationalism or racism but either way, it really just isn’t that great a tattoo and besides if we all felt the need to tattoo ourselves with national symbols just to feel like we’re a part of something, I’d have a pot of gold tattooed on one arse cheek, a potato on the other and a rainbow connecting the two.

Wanderlust

We fucking get it ok, you’re a free spirit. So free that you need to tattoo it on your body somewhere you can see just to reaffirm it with yourself and everyone around you.

We recommend using this list as a way to make new friends in your hostels by turning it into a drinking game or something, just make sure you double check that they’re not actually on the list first. Or keep the bordem at bay on long bus journey by coming up with a some more to add to the list and them comment them here so we can do round two.

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