Are you one?
It’s Valentine’s Day! And as such we feel the need to spread the love with you, our beautiful Stokies. For most people Valentine’s Day is the day when the romantically unadventurous show their affection for their significant others/crushes by doing basic things like giving them dead plants. No offence to anyone who gave and/or received roses or other flowers today, but shouldn’t we be asking for MORE from and for our loved ones than a couple of unimaginative floral corpses?
Yes you most certainly should.
So here at Stoke Travel we’ve decided to give you our guide to love on the road — big, sloppy, messy love-out-of-a-backpack. There’s no place for love like Europe, especially at the drunken orgies festivals we spend most of our time at. We’ve spent a bit of time thinking about this subject, mostly in the tossing and turning hours between the end of our party and the start of our shift, and consider ourselves to be somewhat learned on the subject. Look and learn and love.
- Love yourself. Regularly and passionately. If you can’t love yourself then how can you expect anybody to love you? Try not to love yourself when you’re in sight and/or earshot of anyone else, because not only does that not constitute self love, it can really put you off your stroke. If you’re at a Stoke Travel camp and the need for self love arises, perhaps find a quiet place, like in the toilets, or politely ask your tent mate to give you a minute, literally.
- It’s ok to be single. Heck, there’s a school of thought that says it’s ideal to be single. Firstly, you’ll become a ninja at loving yourself, because it’s difficult to find someone to do it with/for you! And then when you start travelling Europe you’ll be open to the smorgasbord of flesh that presents itself at every Mediterranean discotech. Get your tongs out and pick and choose, explore new flavours; Swedish meatballs, Spanish chorizos, French baguettes, German dumplings — the world just isn’t your oyster, it’s the whole goddamn seafood buffet. Expand your palette, while you have the chance. Try something new, maybe even mix some produce together.
- Being in a relationship isn’t the worst. It’s just not the best, necessarily. Travelling is tough on a relationship, and being on the road will put your love to the test. So much temptation, so many stressful situations, too much information (try sharing a tiny hotel room with someone suffering from the rum dumps). If your relationship lasts your journey then it you guys should get fucken married and have half a dozen kids. If it doesn’t, well, shit, there are worse places to be when you’re getting over a broken heart. Hit those discotechs and leave your hangups at home with your underwear.
- Have an open mind. What are you, a Victorian dowager? Travelling Europe isn’t the time to be stuck in your ways, it’s a time of exploration, both of the physical world, and of your own body. If you’re with your beloved you can really expand your horizons, if you’re freshly single you can squish your way to memory loss and if you’ve been single for a while then chances are you’re a depraved fiend looking to get their kicks from wherever you can. Now we’re not suggesting that if that elderly German couple invites you to their sex dungeon after Oktoberfest you have to go, but you probably should. Imagine the stories you’d have afterwards! Sure, you’d never be able to tell them to anybody out of fear of being cast out from your family and also making yourself entirely unattractive to all and any future love interests, but you’d have some pretty amazing stories for yourself, to think about while you’re frantically scrubbing the filth from your skin every damn night.
- There’s more than one way to get the electricity flowing. From the baby making one socket–one prong, to switchboards that feature only sockets, or just prongs, as well as wonderful multiple socket-prong combinations — it’s all love in our eyes, and it’s all good. You can get down in any way, shape, or form that takes your fancy. We won’t judge you, in fact, we’ll be proud. You get in there however you want to and get those sparks flying.
- Don’t be a creep. This one is really important, because sometimes in this sexually liberal environment some guys, and it’s usually always guys, get a little bit carried away and go from being enthusiastic to being massively lecherous critters. Let us tell you, when you turn into a mega creep it works entirely against your intentions. Take a breather, brother, play it cool, relax, wear a leather jacket, buy a motorbike, say things like, Hey, hot sugar, what are you doin’?, maybe take up smoking, whatever, but choose cool over creep every day! Chicks dig cool, and they really dislike creep.
And there you have our guide to love. Are you sufficiently informed? Do you feel like the world is ready for your lovin’? Have you learned nothing at all? Just let it be known that we love you and we’d especially love it if you joined us this year for some big time parties, some erotic adventures and everything else that makes for a successful European sojourn.
Speaking of love, you’re just going to love our Passport. Have a look here and maybe buy one and then we’ll be sharing all of our lovin’ with you.