Galería OHZ

El pasado fin de semana, nos fuimos a visitar la galería de nuestra amiga Paula, OHZ, en el centro de Oviedo. Conocimos a Paula en los Quasimotos en Burriana, siendo ella la artista que se encargó del diseño del cartel y de las camisetas de la cuarta edición. En su vuelta a Asturias, Paula ha sido […]

New Springfest Policy: “You Must Be This Drunk to Ride”

Officials at Munich’s Fruhlingsfest, better known as Springfest, have instituted a new minimum-drunkenness requirement for the carnival at this year’s festival.  Meant to combat dangerous under-indulgence, the proposed policy change would require anybody wishing to board one of the festival’s massive carnival rides to provide adequate proof of inebriation.

“Fruhlingsfest is a fun time, and most people know how to enjoy the holiday appropriately,” said festival official Jannes Biergeliebter.  “Every year, however, we have some people who let themselves get much too sober, and it can ruin things for everybody.”

Biergeliebter explained that the rule was adopted only after careful consideration.  “We want people to enjoy Fruhlingsfest in their own way, but sometimes you must be firm to preserve the integrity of the festival.”

According to the new regulation, rides at Springfest’s carnival will enforce minimum inebriation requirements that vary from ride to ride.  Some rides, like the ferris wheel, will only demand that riders be under the influence of two or three liters. Other, more adventurous rides will have steeper expectations.

“Basically, the faster it spins, the more pissed you’ll have to be,” said Heinrich Gotz, who works at the carnival.  Gotz and other carnival crew members are currently going through training to recognize and quantify states of wastedness in preparation for the April 20th opening.

“To get into the fun house, for example, usually it’s enough just to be talking too loudly,” Gotz said.  “There are a couple rides with much stricter requirements, though. For the rides that spin upside down, I probably won’t let you on unless you need help standing in line.”

“Training our carnival workers is a way of keeping the process fair,” said Biergeliebter. “Everybody expresses their tipsiness differently.  For example, I often tell colleagues how much I love and respect them after only two liters, but I don’t begin to slur until a half dozen. By learning how to identify the signs, we can ensure that nobody gets too clear-headed.”

Biergeliebter is very excited to see the proposed changes in action.  “If everything works like it should, we will see much fewer visitors who are endangering the mood by under-indulging.”

Meet us at Springfest and prove you can maintain a festival-appropriate level of intoxication. Check here for examples of acceptable behavior.  

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What To Do Between Parties: Ibiza

We know it can be hard to imagine a time in Ibiza that wouldn’t be better spent partying. Trust us when we say that there’s plenty of champagne and, ahem..other vices to fill your days, but Spring Break is also a great time to explore the rest of the island.  The tourist season isn’t quite in full swing yet, so visitors can enjoy off-season prices in the same great weather that draws millions every summer.

Catch the sunset in Sant Antoni

Sant Antoni de Portmany is a harbor city and nightlife hub on the west coast of Ibiza.  Stoke’s Spring Break Ibiza trip is based in Sant Antoni, so this is a great way to kill a couple hours before the party starts heating up.  Head down to the harbor and have a snack or a couple drinks while enjoying the fantastic sunsets that Sant Antoni is known for.  Be sure to get there early, though.  While Ibiza is much less crowded in spring, don’t expect to find a seat if you show up 10 minutes before the sun goes down.  For a longer excursion, take a hike up to Torre des Savinar (often called the Pirate’s Tower) for unparalleled views of the mysterious Vedra Island that looms off Ibiza’s west coast.

Visit Ibiza’s Old Town

Dalt Vila (Upper Town) is a UNESCO World Heritage Site and well worth an afternoon. The historic district features steep streets lined with whitewashed, gothic spanish architecture and huge medieval ramparts.  Take your walking shoes and a few spare hours to explore this maze of hidden gems, world-class restaurants, and stunning views. Be sure to come in through the main gate – Portal de Ses Taules – for the full effect.

Get a delicious authentic meal

One of our favorite things about Spring Break Ibiza is that it’s still technically in the off-season.  Everything on the island jacks prices up in the summer, but in April, things are still priced pretty reasonably. Why not take an evening off the party life, put on a fresh shirt, and enjoy the best meal you’ve had in ages? Mediterranean Spanish food is simple and diverse, with plenty of fresh seafood and fantastic vegetarian options.  For a truly memorable meal, try some spiny blue lobster (a delicious variety rarely found outside the Balearic Islands).

Day trip to formentera

If you somehow find yourself bored with the island of hedonism, try hopping on a ferry for a day trip to Formentera, the island next door to Ibiza.  Formentera is one of the last paradise islands left in the Mediterranean.  It manages to strike a balance between nature conservancy and tourism, and the only way there is by boat from either the mainland or Ibiza.  This keeps Formentera a tranquil slice of heaven, with over 20 km of natural beaches.  Formentera is also a gorgeous place to snorkel because it’s natural geography creates uniquely clean water and allows for an underwater jungle (also a UNESCO site) to grow just off the coast. The ferry only takes half an hour, but Formentera is an easy place to spend an entire day.

Hire a car/scooter and explore

Car/scooter hires are priced very reasonably in the off-season, and can be a great way to explore Ibiza.  Nothing compares with the freedom to explore that having your own transport can provide.  Ibiza is full of nature preserves and beautiful scenery.  Es Broll is a short drive from Sant Antoni, and offers amazing views of a verdant valley dotted with natural pools and agricultural terraces. Sa Talaiassa, in the south of the island, is the highest point in Ibiza, and you can reach the summit by car/scooter or by foot (roughly 5 km round trip).  The Ses Salines Park is a huge nature reserve featuring natural salt marshes and hundreds of species of birds.  Finally, some popular beaches on Ibiza include Cala d’Hort, Cala Saladeta, and Playa Cala Xarraca (a shallow cove popular for snorkeling)

Just remember, there will be plenty of time at Spring Break Ibiza that you don’t remember, so be sure to do something you can tell friends at home about.

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REPORT: Germans Actually Rather Nice People

A shocking new report has come out of Europe, suggesting that Germans are seriously really  nice people. The report, gained from travellers’ experiences visiting Europe’s most populous country, suggest that the people of Deutchland are happy, welcoming, kind and fun, completely shattering all previous stereotypes.

Germans have long been thought of as the serious, humourless, hardworking Europeans, whose lack of love for life made them the ideal workers to prop up the economies of Europe’s lazier nations, but not really the people you’d want to party with. This latest report, however, throws doubt on these assumptions.

Professor Hans Burgerman of Dusseldorf University explains. “Ze Germans have for a long time suffered these incorrect stereotypes and we think it’s about time ze world knew just how nice we are. People think we are all serious because we do work hard and hardly ever smile, and that we have no humour because you have never seen us laugh, but that’s just not true. We are some of the happiest, gregarious and outgoing people you will ever meet, especially if you catch us drinking beer. Which we do for breakfast sometimes.”

Professor Burgerman explained that the stereotypes were somewhat born out of linguistics and history. “People say that ze German language is harsh, and we admit that it can be, but only when it has to be. Have you ever had a fair Bavarian maiden tell you Ich liebe dich? Or perhaps a helpful young man has offered you a Keine problem when you knocked over his Jagermeister? It is really a beautiful tongue, when you’re not being yelled at. As for ze history, well, what can we do? We did some bad things, but zat’s why we’re trying now to be extra nice now.”

Bridget Clapton, a young traveller from the States, has confirmed that the Germans really are actually kind of pretty nice. “Oh ya, so when I went to Munich for Springfest I just assumed that all the Germans were harsh, you know? All that SPRECHEN SIE DEUTSCH? stuff, plus they’re like the bad guys in every movie. But then I went there and everybody was sooooo lovely! They were really welcoming, invited me to dance on their tables with them, taught me how to say cheers… PROST! and just generally shattered all of the negative stereotypes. Wünderbar!

But some analysts are warning travellers to not take the reports too seriously. “Yeah sure, the Germans are nice now, but have you ever been to a German comedy show? “hat do they even laugh at? What’s funny for a German? Bad engineering? Are all the jokes about bad engineering? Or poorly brewed beer? Ja have you seen the engine mounts on the new Toyota? Zey are like beer made without bubbles, and das isn’t güd. I just don’t know what they find funny, so I don’t know if they can actually be nice”, asked an activist from the anti-German thinktank, BratWORST.

Stoke Travel knows that Germans are actually really super nice people, because we spend a month with them every year for Springfest (and then another for Oktoberfest). You should join us and see for yourself just how actually really nice they can be. They are SUPER!

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Semester Studying Abroad Qualifies Uni Student as Cultural Expert

The office of the U.S. ambassador to Spain reported Thursday that they were considering 20-year-old University of Texas student Carter Cormann for a cultural attaché position.  “As far as we’re concerned, Cormann’s five months in Barcelona have totally qualified him to consult on sensitive cross-cultural issues at home and abroad,” a representative told Stoke News.

Stoke reached out to Cormann for comment on his apparent mastery of the Spanish way of life.  “When I was in Spain, I really got to know the people,” he said.  “I spent a lot of time drinking cerveza and eating tapas with mis amigos.”

Stating they were unbothered by Cormann’s lack of degree and political experience, the office of the ambassador emphasized how much the young excursionist had impressed them during an extensive interview process.

“We’re technically required to spend months completing background checks, verifying qualifications and vetting references before we hire anybody,” said a source close to the Ambassador.  “But from the first time Cormann said ‘When I was in Barthelona..,” I think we were all convinced.”

While it was apparent that he had a strong command of Spanish linguistics, the savvy student shattered any reservations still held by the hiring committee with a deep understanding of tense political issues.

One diplomat told Stoke that, although officially the U.S. supports a unified Spain, Cormann’s passionate summary of the Catalan independence movement had him close to tears.

“I really understand how the Catalan people feel,” Cormann told Stoke. “They’re stuck in something that they really want to leave, which is how I felt in pretty much all my classes.” What’s more, although  based in Barcelona, Cormann insisted that his weekend trips to Valencia, Sevilla and Madrid gave him license to comment on Spain as a whole.

“It’s clear to me that [Cormann] is very dedicated to representing Spanish ideals,” said an embassy official. “We took him out to dinner to officially offer the position, and he insisted we change our reservation to 9 p.m. at the earliest.”

At press time, the juvenile connoisseur had not yet accepted the offer, saying “I want to look around at all my options first.  The embassy won’t even give me an hour for siesta!”

Fancy becoming an expert yourself? Stoke Barcelona will be your party ambassadors on land and sea.  

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Josh Seemann pedazo de surfer. Dinamita pura

Josh Seemann un joven californiano que esta dando mucho que hablar con su espectacular  surfing, un soplo de aire fresco, una mezcla de clasicismo, con un toque de innovación, que lleva el longboard a otro nivel.

REPORT: You’re A Much Better Person When You’re Drunk

A long-term study conducted across everybody everywhere forever has confirmed that you are actually a better version of yourself drunk than sober.

The study supports what we’ve long believed about ourselves, and acts as an official justification for having “just one more” repeatedly, until having one more is no longer an option.

The scienticians behind the study have found that when drunk absolutely everybody achieves personal bests in the key performance indicators (KPIs) of attractiveness, humour and dancing ability, otherwise known as the three pillars of being awesome.

“The study shows that even just one standard drink will make you a better person, be it a beer, wine or tequila shot, and that it’s effective any time of day,” explained lead scientist, Dave Boon. “We have shown that people who put Baileys in their morning coffee can start the day being the best possible version of themselves and continue on that high throughout the day just by regular topping up with a cheeky shandy here or there.”

But while the studies into day drinking will be comforting to some of the more seasoned partiers, or pretty much anybody on holidays, it’s the unequivocal findings into having a tipple at nighttime that will appeal to most drinkers.

“When somebody heads out at night in a social situation, we have found that not only does having  drink make them a better person, it often makes them the only version of themself that can survive in that socialising environment –  when they were sober just the idea of going into the club filled them with dread, but after few drinks it was almost like they were born to do it. Just like a fish’s gills enable them to live in an underwater environment, our studies show that drinking alcohol gives people the tools necessary to survive socially.”

The study was completed by asking people what they thought of themselves while sober and then compared the responses with the same questions asked while drunk. Without fail the participants thought that they were more physically attractive, absolutely hilarious and devastating on the dancefloor after a few drinks, while on the contrary they often didn’t think they were much to look at, not funny at all and too embarrassed to dance when dry.

Critics of the study have raised concerns that just taking someone’s opinion of themselves is unethical, as while they may think they’re killing it, literally everybody around them may think that they’re acting like a complete dick. They propose that in order to do a more complete study, people should be at least forced to watch videos of their drunk selves the next day, preferably whilst in the grips of a particularly regret-filled hangover.

But Boon was dismissive of the criticisms. “We would ask anybody who doesn’t believe in the study to have a few drinks and then tell us how they feel. We guarantee that they’ll agree with us that they’re hotter, more charming and a hotshot on the dancefloor after as few as two “Jaeger bombs”. We’re always being told to not worry about what anyone thinks of us, so if we think we’re top shit after a few cans of beer, who’s to tell us we’re not?”

If you feel like feeling great about yourself, why not join Stoke Travel for one of our many alcohol assisted adventures, like Springfest, the great April-May beer festival, or Stoked in the Park, our party program during Pamplona’s running of the bulls. Heck, during most of these parties we provide somewhat free beer, so being the best possible version of you won’t break the bank either. Bottom’s up!

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McTavish Trim 18 Wrap Up, VIVA LOS GLIDERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TABLAS INCREÍBLES

Otro año mas la gente de MC TAVISH surfboards a reunido a un nutrido grupo de buenos surfers, con sus tablas gliders, tablas enormes y diferentes donde prima el “TRIM” y el deslizamiento puro y donde el noseriding pasa a un segundo plano. 2018 McTavish Trim Lineup: Victoria Vergara Jared Mell Brett Caller Bryce Young […]

MEXILOGFEST empieza la cuenta atrás para la gran fiesta del surfing en la Saladita. video

En apenas 59 dias tendremos el MEXILOGFEST organizado por nuestro amigo Israel Preciado, una fiesta del surfing que reunirá a muchos de los mejores longboarders mundiales, en la maravillosa ola de La Saladita. Este certamen se ha consolidado gracias a la constancia de Israel y su equipo, los apoyos no son muchos, los suplen con imaginación […]